What I learned from 10 Minutes with Katy Perry

So what’s Katy Perry’s Secret?

Her secret skill is active listening, which can only happen when your mind is trained to focus.

Sometimes life lessons come through in the most unique ways. This is a story of one of those moments. I was recently gifted the Katy Perry VIP experience while at Inman Connect in Las Vegas. I’m familiar with a few of her songs like Firework and ROAR, but was really most excited about going to see the joy of my friend and client, Tiffany McQuaid, who adores Katy and all that she represents. In the spirit of transparency, I didn’t fully understand it. I’m not someone who fangirls for anyone really. And, the media I had seen about Katy was mixed at best (I’m thinking of the weird eye glitch video that went viral) but her songs are catchy and the evening together with our group would be fun. Little did I know, I was about to be hit with a massive awakening. Let me explain.

The VIP experience included an opportunity to meet Katy backstage before the concert began. There were orange, inflatable plastic couches, candy kabobs, and various props for photo ops. The forty or so other “VIPs” were waiting with us, ranging from an entire family with young ones in tow, to a 6 '5”  drag queen from Scotland in a hand-sewn costume inspired by Katy herself. The energy of the room was excitement and anticipation. Every few moments or so, one of the producers would walk by and give us an update, “not too much longer, she will be out in a few more minutes.”

Finally, we were tapped on the shoulder and were first in line. When Katy came out, she was dressed in a white and pink plastic dress, white go-go boots, and a full black wig. She looked exactly as you would expect her to look, ready for her performance. The rest of this experience however, was anything but expected, she surprised me so deeply and profoundly, it took a few days to truly process the impact and how I could incorporate the lessons into my life. 

Tiffany went first. She had met Katy previously at a similar VIP event as a present from a special friend. Katy remembered her. She remembered their conversation. She remembered the advice she gave. As I was watching Katy interact with Tiffany, I felt an almost out of body experience, like a snapshot of time standing still. Here’s what I noticed, Katy was 100% and completely present with Tiffany. She had full eye contact, active listening, and used physical touch as validation. She treated Tiffany as if she was the only person in that room despite the line forming of people eagerly waiting for their turn to meet her. 

I’ve met numerous celebrities, influencers and people of importance in the past. I’ve always left feeling underwhelmed, or surprised at how “normal” they were. This is not what I experienced with Katy. On the contrary, I was completely moved by her presence, not just her energy, but how profoundly present she was with everyone. Her mastery was her ability to hyper-focus on the person in front of her, to make them feel like they mattered, like we mattered, and were the only people in the room. We each felt seen. Her presence was a gift, and I can honestly say, it was one of the few times I’ve ever felt this way with anyone, let alone a pop star wearing a plastic dress. She told our group that her secret was transcendental meditation, which of course piqued my interest and validated an assumption about the power of focus in a distracted world.

After the end of the meet and greet, where I watched her treat every single person with an intense level of dignity and care, she proceeded to toast the group. With a shot of tequila raised in the air, she recounted something of importance from each conversation she had with the people in that room. Toasting John in the hamburger suit who traveled 300 miles, to Sara who had a test next week, to Alan who brought his daughter to celebrate her birthday. It was incredible. Not only was she listening, she recalled the conversations and the names of the people in the room. Her secret skill is active listening, which can only happen when your mind is trained to focus. Her performance began before she even hit the stage.

This level of presence didn’t end in the VIP room. She brought this same level of connection during the show. She pointed to audience members, called people by name, and pointed to Tiffany when she told her personal story about her belief in feathers being a sign from the Universe, a sentiment that Tiffany had shared with her earlier. It was inspiring to watch this unfold. This was a master’s class in human connection.

Counter this experience with being at Inman Connect and meeting numerous people from the industry. The level of distraction and disengagement was in stark contrast to what I experienced with Katy. Conversations with others while they were visibly scanning the room for other people they should talk with. Meals and meetings with people half engaged while scanning phones and responding to texts. And the worst, interruption mid-sentence to wave across the room to someone else. I’m guilty of doing all of the above, too. But, after the experience with Katy, I am changing my behavior, period. I want people to walk away from a conversation with me feeling seen and valued. If a pop star, with a crowd of over 5000 screaming fans vying for attention can do this, so can I.

But how? What is transcendental meditation and how can this be the key to her superpower of presence? For the past ten years, I have cultivated a very regular, ritualized mindful meditation practice. The intent of this work is to calm and focus what yogis call “the monkey mind.” Mindful meditation leverages the senses and breath to become the watcher of the mind, and eventually wrangle its chatter into a state of ease. This allows deeper work of chakra opening, mind-body-spirit alignment, and going deep into the spiritual well. This spiritual well or “heart center” is the place where our intuition lies, the Source of our soul connection, or entry point to the Infinite Creator, meaning, connection to Source, spiritual ascension or enlightenment. Transcendental meditation however, is more secular and is about focus. It’s a trademarked process with trained instructors on the method that is based on mantra to quiet the mind. The less mind chatter, the less chaos, the easier it becomes to be fully present in the moment.

Katy had to maintain a level of intense focus and presence from the moment she stepped into the VIP room until she completed her last set on stage. This was easily a four hour marathon and it was awe-inspiring to witness that level of performance, and would have been completely exhausting to nearly every other human. It was obvious she has truly mastered the art of focus and is the power behind her superstardom. There are very few times when I’ve felt I was in the presence of greatness and I’m surprised to report that this was my personal experience of meeting Katy Perry. Despite what you may or may not think you know about her, she is a master at her craft and meditation helped her achieve this level of performance.

Want to know how meditation can help sharpen your mind and create focus? Curious how Redtail Creative uses meditation, focus and active listening to solve complex business problems? Email me directly to discuss: molly@redtailcreative.com